Just a quick end of year post and update on us. I wanted to write about coping. Lets face it, it’s an interesting topic. How many times have you heard someone say “I don’t know how she/he does it?!” “how does she manage with 4 kids?” “how does she cope with her sick kid” “how does he cope being away for so long” and so on.
It’s the weirdest thing. If someone had told me 10 years ago, that I would be diagnosed with MS, no, NMO (or whatever), I would have said “there’s no way I’ll cope with that!” I love my netball too much, I love cycling too much, I love working away and travelling too much. The thing is though, when it happens to you, you just do. There’s no wrong way, or right way, but there are some unhealthy ways. When it happens to you, when something life changing happens, it’s months before you realise ‘I’m actually coping with this,’ sometimes even years. Your body goes into auto pilot and it just happens. I’m not saying it’s always easy, but it does just happen.
Same goes for Clint I think, jeez it certainly hasn’t been easy, but I think Clint’s auto pilot just switched on. Kind of like a Dory moment… “just keep swimming, just keep swimming.” If I had known this was going to happen earlier, I would have guessed Clint wouldn’t have coped quite this well. I guess it helps when you have a team of people on your side and certainly the right attitude. He amazes me everyday.
People often ask me, how are we coping? I find this a strange question. Don’t stress if you’ve asked me this, many of you reading this have probably asked me that very question. It’s strange because, how do you answer it? I like it better when the question is followed up with “is there anything I can do to help?” because I can answer that one!
We are coping just ok. We are leaning on each other. It’s a strange situation. So much of Clint’s job was to care for me, now so much of mine is caring for him. We are caring for each other I guess. And we are doing ok. A psychologist at RPH said to us one day ” it’s like being up high on a ledge, there’ll be days when you are hanging on by two hands, and days with just one finger, you are still hanging on, and that’s what’s important.” That has stayed with us, both of us.
Neither of us would wish for our situation. It is unique and often terrifying and right now it is devastating. There have been many set backs and it has only been 3 months since Clint’s injury. We are hanging on though, and I just know we will continue to. I know this because we have each other, and so many other people helping us and because we have pretty efficient auto pilots. I think we are just pretty ordinary people in an extraordinary situation with great autopilots. Don’t forget about us though. When we seem to be doing ok, keep asking us if there’s anything you can do to help. Sometimes it helps just hearing it!
And with that I wish you all a happy belated Christmas and a better 2017. I think we have had well and truly our fair share of dramas, so here’s to a much needed boring and uneventful 2017!